So I figure it's probably time for me to post again. I haven't decided what emotional direction this one will take but I will be a creature of habit and start it with a story.
It was a dark and stormy night and the men said to their Captain "Tell us a tale!" And this is the tale he told: "It was a dark and stormy night....." Right, how about not.
It really was dark but that is still no excuse. I was shuffling off to do my dear mothers bidding and I walked betwixt the trailer and the van while forgetting that the two were joined in matrimony. The old shin whacks the hitch and over I go like a top heavy bowling pin. My face contacts the gravel and I go from a nice young man to a street fighter in a bounce or two. Curses! I see Johannes Kepler and Copernicus' theory of orbit flash before my eyes in three dimensional detail. In other words I behold the heavens with both eyes closed. I roll over to my back and drape my arm over my forehead in the pitiable position of despair. The comfort squad approaches but I fend them off with threats. A sudden burst of emotion forces itself on the overfull hoover dam.
Here I insert this comment because I am proud. It really didn't hurt that much, I actually thought it was funny. And so should you, except for the next part.
I feel the urge to cry. And of course I think to myself, "What is this, tears? Auhh! Mon Dieu! A grown man crying! What kind of lame sauce is this...." I get up and stumble over to a log and sit myself down to sort my emotions with a bloody face. WHY on EARTH am I Crying! Arghhh. I can just feel the annoyance surge over me in waves. Then more tears. And then sunshine at 9:00pm at night. Here I am taking a risk. I am a young man, I have hopes, dreams, and wants, and I have realized yet again that they are next to impossible. So this emotion is a result of discouragement, down-right sadness, some pride, a little bit of anger, I'm guessing some jealousy (for good measure) and excitement. Quite the witches brew, eh? Well I still haven't sorted it out but quite a bit of it comes down to setting goals that no one can stop you from attaining.
Huzzah! I can be undefeated if my own lazy self is my greatest enemy. A song is sometimes appropriate.